This is a gentle entreaty to the schoolgirl at the coffee shop this AM who was inhaling a Freeze (iced mocha coffee):
I know it sucks to have to suit up in a rigid synthetic nylon and polyester sack five days a week; the styling of which was mandated in the most prosaic garish or sapless hues known to mankind. None of the humourless school garb I wore did anything for my complexion or figure either.
And like the most stylish high school drop out Anna Wintour can attest, it is not only eternally du jour, but also quite necessary to adjust hemlines and elongate sleeves if a girl is to outwardly express some individuality and fabulousness.
But I fear that your hemline has crept so far north that even Twiggy would blush.
You may be young and beautiful but the continent that falls below your hemline isn’t.
And because your mother is either blind or deluded, or maybe still too busy wearing down her thumb on her mobile screen, I feel I must tell you that one day you might even regret this decision. I did.
Love yourself. Be more. Wear more. Please.